Now let’s talk about some of the worst (but most rewarding) parts of exchange. No matter what it is or to what extent, we all go through rough times. Homesickness, depression and the feeling of growing apart and being lonely are all normal feelings to have during your exchange year, and in my opinion, it’s some of the most important feelings. I believe that it’s a sign of you giving up your old self and growing.
“(your unconscious) knows that “the way things used to be” is no longer tenable or constructive that the process of growing and giving up is begun on an unconscious level... “
This excerpt is from a book that has helped me take complete advantage of my exchange, The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck. Through this chapter I learned that not only is it normal to have lows on exchange, but it’s necessary for life and to grow as a person.
Just the other day I was reminded of this fact by my portuguese teacher, Elton. I pointed out how I felt like he’s changed and he said to me that it wasn’t him that had changed but it was me. I’m noticing things differently now because I am growing into a new person, I’m letting go of my old self. And letting go of my old self is giving me new perspectives on nearly everything. Him pointing that out to me was just proof that I had let go of a part of my old self.
I admit, it sucks to be struggling alone in a foreign country without anyone you know. It’s just awful, honestly. But you need to learn. You need to learn how to adapt and how to be open to change. It’s natural. The more that you anticipate something and understand that it’s natural, the easier it is to get through.
No matter what you do or where you go, at some point in life everybody struggles, everybody feels alone, it’s human nature. How you decide to cope with that is completely on you. You can either give up and just run away from the problem, or you can face it with love and try to make the world a better place. By facing the problem and stepping out of your comfort zone you are expanding yourself. “The extension of the self involved in loving is an enlargement of the self into new dimensions”. This is another quote from page 138 of the book The Road Less Traveled. This has helped me come to an understanding that only good things can come from love. No matter what, if you face a problem with love and kindness it will prove to others, and yourself, that you are capable and mature of more than you thought.